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Fixin' Golf

Randy Wilson

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The only way to fix golf now is to return to the days of the REAL golfer.  But who is the REAL golfer? Where do they come from?  

 

REAL golfers don't kick big balls into giant holes while riding skateboards.  They don't pay a green fee just to drink beer with their buddies and hoss a tiny car around a grassy theme park without fear of DUI roadblocks.  They will not divert their golf budget away from actually playing golf to a hybrid driving range/bar/bowling alley/carnival.

 

The REAL golfer is the foundation of golf and has been for a very long time.  Easily identified by their habits, they obsess about golf, study swing theory, fixate on equipment and can be rendered catatonic by photos of great golf courses.  The REAL golfer will often run outside in the middle of the night, 4-iron in hand, to test a stance or grip adjustment.  

 

REAL golfers do not care about flower beds, azaleas, dogwoods, crepe myrtles and overseed so thick the turf underneath doesn't see the sun until August.  They don't limit their course selection to only those requiring a dinner jacket to eat lunch or lashes with a bamboo cane for changing shoes in the parking lot.

 

REAL golfers are hard individuals, enthusiastic about playing the game on rugged courses, even in a cold, windy mist.  They are not there to rate the course like a judge from some idiotic TV talent show, gushing praise over air-brushed aesthetics. The REAL golfer is there to play.

 

It's the REAL golfers who will fix golf.  Where do they come from?  Watch this short film to find out . . . oh, and get off my lawn.

 



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