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About this blog

Randy and the gang at Rockbottum Country Club pontificate on Rockbottum wisdom and skeletal golf, among other madness.

Entries in this blog

Are You Using Filters?

A few days ago, I discovered people have been using digital filters to enhance their online appearance and dating marketability.  This is pure deception, as some of these filters are capable of structural alteration, moving facial bones around like some kind of tikkity-tok plastic surgeon. Online filters remind me of something that happened decades ago, during my first tour as an assistant superintendent.  We were in an inflationary economic cycle and it was fiscally necessary to have a roo

Rockbottum Radio: We Tried to Warn Us!

In this episode, RW gets tangled up in AI when he tries to use Chat-GBB to write the radio show and that failure results in a spirited rant aimed at those we entrusted with getting out the water conservation message. Just as the way forward is revealed, Count Noomskool of the World Globalar Golf Forum arrives and waves huge sums of money at Momma, in order to subjugate Rockbottum CC's verboten individualist attitude.

Khaki Pants on Parade

A new Rockbottum film has surfaced:  "Khaki Pants on Parade." While we were trying to shoot a pleasant little film entitled "Downrange with RW", one of my extra personalities got loose and hijacked the whole thing.  Momma could have stopped it, but she enjoys a good tirade . . . especially when it targets that Khaki Pants Crowd.  Must be the time of year.   

Know These New Rules for 2023

Recently, Fester N. Boyle, our Club President, and our Head Pro Hugh Jass Bedendorfer, withdrew Rockbottum CC from USGA membership and joined the PGHA, or "Progressive Golf Handicap Association."  The PGHA has designed friendlier, more progressive golf rules to help equitably grow the game, as opposed to the hidebound, stuffy old USGA/RAA rules.  They have also included rules to help guide the Golf Course Superintendent toward a more inclusive and safe golf course environment. Fester and Hu

Rockbottum Predicted The "Reset"?

In this short film — originally produced six years ago — Rockbottum CC predicted "The Reset", long before Klaus and his cronies went public with their version. In Part One of Skeletal Golf Theory 101, we took a hard look at the "business" of golf.  We did not rely on data, just anecdotal analysis gathered over 50+ years in all facets of the industry. As our economy reacts to the latest spending spree carried out by politicians, perhaps it's time to study SGT 101. You just never know.

Rockbottum Radio: 3 Tales from the Rockbottum Vault

Rockbottum Radio presents our annual Halloween broadcast, with not one, but three spooky golf stories.  These stories are full of scary messages and at least one real good golf course management tip, so send out the crew, close the office door and settle in for some golf trauma as only Rockbottum CC can share.

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Podcast

The Vandals Are Coming

When the Visigoths, Ostrogoths, Huns, and Norsemen invaded, they typically came during the day.  But the Golf Vandals are an entirely different bunch.  A cowardly, mindless tribe, the Golf Vandals favor the cover of night.   Agitated by their ever present hand-screens, they can quickly become hysterical when faced with reality. You can use techno-wizardry to neutralize the GV, but remember:  While they are easily frightened, they will return in greater numbers. NOTE:  The counter-measu

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Rockbottum Philosophy

Return of The Brass Monkey

One of the most brilliant Rockbottum films ever produced was "The Brass Monkey Alert", shot somewhere around 13 years ago.  Suppressed by powerful forces in golf, the film was banished to the cold darkness of the censored TN film vault, along with that film we made about a magazine. But now, emboldened by modern times and a crusty "I don't care anymore" attitude that comes from hitting a certain age, we are unleashing The Brass Monkey once again.  Watch to the end to learn some important ti

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Rockbottum Philosophy

Backyard Bentgrass

In the "And Now For Something Completely Different" category--because it's unhealthy to obsess on the digital hysteria currently being poured into our skulls--here is some comedy.  We went deep into the Rockbottum Vault and extracted a film that we've kept hidden for many years.  If you are unable to laugh at this, you don't need a doctor, just delete Tikkity-Tok, Space-Book, Tweety, and stop carrying that phone around like it's some kind of life support system.    

Rockbottum Radio: How Did We Get HERE?

In this episode of Rockbottum Radio, Rockbottum CC's latest hire prefers to work from home, inflation takes a toll on course operations, and RW shifts his customer emphasis from thrifty golfers to the elite class.  A run-in with royalty leads RW to wonder how we got here.

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Podcast

Mental Toughness in the Heat

Every few years, it gets hot.  This thrills the mass media because it allows them to pound the fear drums and increase their ratings.  So, whenever it gets warm outside, we release a training film full of helpful tips designed to strengthen mental toughness in the heat.  As a bonus, here is a column from ten years ago, explaining our most valuable strategy for dealing with the heat: The 100 Days of Hell Actually, it's more like 120 days for those of us trapped on a bentgrass plantation

The Birth of Skeletal Golf Theory

In the early summer of 1969, Dad took the reins of Polvadero Country Club, an emaciated crispy nine-holer located in the dry and dusty Kettleman Hills near Coalinga, California.  Destined to be the Head Pro, GM, GCS, and Bartender--that last one was kind of tough for a non-drinker--he took immediate action. First, Dad evaluated the staff, which consisted of Fernando, age 35, who also worked close by at a cotton farm; in addition, there was 14 year-old me, a fairly useless, easily distracted

Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

California's ill-considered attempt to convert municipal courses to affordable housing is expertly explained by John Reitman in a recent news article featuring Craig Kessler of the Southern California Golf Association.  Craig played a key role in helping to defeat the bill, defending municipal golf and citing the critical role the muni plays in recruiting future players.  In Reitman's article, Craig said, " . . . municipal golf is the meat and potatoes we all grew up on . . ." That's a smoo

Rockbottum Radio: Got N? Plus, the Perfect Job Interview, and Homeowners Hit by Balls

In this episode, RW and the Gang reveal how to get nitrogen, along with a short demonstration of the perfect job interview and included is an extremely in-depth segment of Unfiltered News.  Storytime is a conflagration of Homeowners hit by Balls and if you stay to the very end, you will be rewarded with information that might save your turf from thinning like my hair.

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Podcast

Find Work/Life Balance

In this rather insensitive film, Momma crashes her bike, Buddy reveals his true name and the secret of his success, Tiffany tells a horror story, Bodell and Jimmy Cole explain why they jumped off the assistant superintendent ladder and Willy details how the Wilsons survived decades of pressure golf through existential mountain biking. Learn how you too can ride the mountain bike to attain improved mental stability, physical wonderfulness and at the same time, attract assistant superintenden

Get The Happy Prescription

At Rockbottum CC, we have been hopelessly addicted to opiates of the endorphin variety for decades. * See the Rockbottum Blog post "Exercise, Brain Function and Depression" column and attached films dated August of 2019 for actual science talk. Endorphins, generated by the brain, are the safest, most effective mood enhancement drugs available, although there are certain corporations that would prefer you did not know that.  In the past, these companies were successful at suppressing the use

Flappin' & Honkin'

In our constant search for inner peace on the golf course, we offer this film from our Boots & Ruck division, entitled:  "Flappin' & Honkin' ". Normally, our stories from the military days are off-limits, but there was just no other way to impart this particular piece of wisdom without data-mining the trauma zone in my skull.   So lace up your boots, shoulder your rucksack and come along for some campfire coffee, philosophy . . . and a tiny little woodstove. No instant cof

Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson in Boots & Ruck Films

The Positive/Negative GCS Ratio

The owner of Rockbottum CC, Ludella Hogwaller, AKA "Momma",  is always stressing the importance of a positive attitude, a positive work environment and presenting the golfer with a positive golf course.  She even has algae-rhythm formulas to determine if the staff is positive or negative. Momma says two negatives can make a positive.  She proved this by changing Ben, our mean and surly golf course dog, from a negative ratio into a positive.  Momma had Ben's two negatives removed and he beca

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